By Susanne Hazen, author Leerboek Familieopstellingen
Children often know more than you think. They sense indescribable things. They sometimes dream things that no one has told them.
Research indicates that children with a strong understanding of their family—such as knowing who their grandmother was, where their grandfather came from, and what happened during the war—score higher in resilience, self-esteem, and social skills.
Why?
Because they are part of a larger story. They feel connected. They have an inner anchor.
The concept of “intergenerational self” is not vague. It is a supportive foundation, especially in times of change or loss. When children lack access to their family’s story, they become isolated more quickly. But when they know who they are—including who created them—solidity arises.
Ancestor work, therefore, isn’t just for adults. It’s also for those who come after us.
When we heal what has been passed down to us, we pass on something else.
By Susanne Hazen, author Leerboek Familieopstellingen
Not every ancestor is a source of strength. Some souls are still restless, filled with pain. But further back in the lineage, four, five, or more generations ago, we often find a different quality.
These ancestors have lived through their experiences. They are at peace and able to transmit their strength. In shamanism, we refer to this as working with empowering ancestors.
During a Systemic Ritual, we consciously bring these ancestors into focus. Not to dredge up old pain, but to reconnect with the source of strength that sustains us.
Especially when life seems stuck, when we feel directionless or overloaded, connecting with these healed forces can spark a new flow.
Ancestor work is not nostalgia. It is an invitation to attune ourselves to what came before us, so that life can flow through us again.
By Susanne Hazen, author Leerboek Familieopstellingen
Science is slowly catching up. While shamans and healers have spoken about the influence of ancestors for thousands of years, epigenetics is now also beginning to confirm that traumas are biologically passed on.
We now know that intense experiences of parents or grandparents – war, loss, hunger, violence – leave their mark on the bodies of subsequent generations, not in the DNA itself, but in the way that DNA expresses itself.
So you don’t have to have experienced something yourself to feel the consequences. And that’s precisely why we’re often shocked by what becomes visible in constellations: the pain is real, but its origins sometimes lie far beyond our own lives.
The trick is not to carry this old pain yourself, but to make it visible, acknowledge it, and leave it with the person to whom it belonged.
That’s where a family constellation can help. But Systemic Ritual can also be very beneficial in this regard.
By Susanne Hazen, author Leerboek Familieopstellingen
We carry our ancestors within us. Not only in our faces, the colour of our eyes or the shape of our hands. Also in our beliefs, fears, reactions, and even in our dreams.
Through our parents, we inherit the patterns of our entire bloodline; an invisible stream stretching back through generations – all the way to the first humans.
Imagine the thousands of lives that preceded ours. So many experiences, choices, loves and losses…
Some of those ancestors are at peace. Others are still processing. And that can affect us – their descendants – without us even knowing it.
What we often refer to as ‘unexplained patterns’ may have origins far beyond our own lives. When we (unconsciously) carry someone else’s pain, it can weaken us. However, when we connect to the healed strength of our ancestors, a profound source of support and clarity emerges.
Ancestral work is not only a tribute to those who came before. It is also a way to fully arrive in your own life.
“The mothers put us into life; the fathers put us into the world”. (Bert Hellinger)
This article is about Fathers! In our psyche, we carry an image of Father. Most of the time, this image is based upon the experience we had with our birth father. However, our psyche also holds images of Father that are informed by the archetype of Father. We can find these images of Father in the old stories: the myths and fairytales. The Father image seems to be universal; it exists in many different cultures worldwide. If we like it or not – this image of Father – influences us more than we realise or wish. It determines our access to masculine energy.
If you want to know more about Systemic Ritual, then come and meet me in these ONLINE workshops. You will EXPERIENCE the work. Next workshop is about FATHERS:
Without healthy, proper access to this masculine energy, we will miss some essential qualities. These are, among others:
Being capable of taking decisions
Taking responsibilities
Vigour
Setting goals and focusing
Setting boundaries
Autonomy
Logical and rational thinking
Independency
This article will explore the archetype Father and the roles connected to that archetype. You will also learn about some basic dynamics found in the practice of Family Constellations and how Systemic Ritual can help to heal the wounds of a rejected father.
“If mom is the gateway to life, dad is the portal to the world.” – Marina Toledo
The primary roles of the Father
In almost every studied culture, fathers have assumed three primary roles: the protector, the provider, and the disciplinarian. Of course, nowadays, in many families, mothers fulfil these three roles as much as fathers. Mothers protect their children and provide for their families by working outside the home and teaching their children as well. Maybe it is better to speak about the yin and yang aspects of parenting or the masculine and feminine qualities needed to raise and nourish children.
Protector The Father protects the family from all danger that can come from outside. He takes care of a safe home for the family. He wants to protect the family from bad things that can happen. But if a bad thing may happen, he is the one that teaches the children to cope with ‘possible dangers’, such as how to cope with strangers, accidents, bullies, and falls. The protector also observes the social environment of the children – their friends and peers, the club, the school, and the neighbourhood. The Father as protector tries to eliminate possible dangers in the social environment of his children.
Provider In many cultures, one of the Father’s primary roles is also that of a provider: taking care of all money/materials needed to provide his family with food, clothes, a roof above the head, etc.
Guide or educator Fathers prepare the child for the future. They want their child to succeed, to see what’s on the horizon, and to aspire to bigger and better things. So, Fathers need to teach their children how to handle their impulses, stay calm under stress, and deal with situations where they don’t endanger themselves or others.
The old stories
In myths and fairytales, the roles of Fathers are well described. The positive aspect of the Father principle suggests law, order, justice, flexible discipline, rationality, understanding, inspiration and authority in the service of protection. All are expressed in images of benevolent and helpful kings, firefighters, healers and guides. The positive Father is an image of the mature masculine, manifesting caring, guidance and protection without infringing on the autonomy of those under his care. The shadow Father emerges when the caring, guidance and protection turn into abuse of authority. The negative Father archetype involves rigidity, control and a cold intellectual way of relating.
Lessons learned from Family Constellations
Our father is the first contact with masculine energy. In order to be able to take our place in the world, we need to take our father.
Addictions When we reject our father, we also reject a part of ourselves. We won’t feel that we will have a right for love, success or fulfilment in life, etc.). So we will feel an inner void that we will try to fill with things from outside. Bert Hellinger observed, through many constellations over the years, that many addictions (alcohol, gambling, sex, food, drugs, etc.) are linked to a missing father. It is as if the addict is attempting to fill the void from his father through the addiction.
“Addictions have Father’s face.” Bert Hellinger
Guru‘s Another symptom of the lack of a father’s power may be expressed by looking for him in religion, spirituality, teachers, leaders, masters and gurus. By that, an adult tries to fulfil the need to be guided and protected. But unfortunately, this will blur their thinking and ability to perceive and the intuition – leading to wrong choices.
Loyalty to the mother When we are born, we see this world through the eyes of the most important person for us, our mother. As a consequence, when we grow up, but remain in the same state, we will also see our fathers through “her eyes”. If a mother is not happy about her relationship, if she rejects her husband, and her children see things through “her eyes”, they also tend to reject the father. For a boy, this will result in an incapability to relate to a woman and build his family. He does not have access to masculine energy. He does not know how to be independent. For a girl, this will result in the fact that she will see in men the same problems her mother sees in her husband. She will repeat her mother’s pattern. But paradoxically, she will look for a father in all men around. As a result, she cannot grow up and be independent properly.
With a disbalance in our feminine and masculine energies, many things around us do not work. For balance, we need both powers, both parents. We need to accept our father inwardly to live life fully.
Systemic Ritual – calling upon the archetypes of Fathers
It can be really difficult to embrace our father entirely inwardly. However, with the help of the positive archetypical Father images, the images of the old stories, we can start healing our wounds of a rejected father and therefore gain more access to healthy masculine qualities. Systemic Ritual offers an opportunity for healing ‘the rejected father’ with the help of the Father archetypes. By connecting to the Father archetypes, we can circumpass in a way the confrontation with the birth father. This can be helpful when the relationship with the birth father is filled with trauma – violence, abuse, for example. By calling upon the archetypical Father image in a Systemic Ritual, access to the male energy can be gained – at least for a while.
“Thank you, dad, for giving me the courage to follow my dreams, the strength to face adversities, the voice to set boundaries, the clarity to discern, the confidence to succeed.” – Marina Toledo
Saturday, May 24th and Sunday, May 25th, 2025 10 am to 4:30pm Sol Healing Center, Austin, Texas Seminar fee: $300 (includes the two-day seminar, digital syllabus, lunch and refreshments)
Join us for a remarkable weekend seminar fusing the practice of Systemic Family Constellations with the grounding power of Shamanic Ritual, engaging the resources of our divine and blood ancestors.
Led by dynamic shamanic practitioner and experienced family constellations trainer Susanne Hazen of Amsterdam, we will engage Systemic Ritual to discover and release family conflicts that have been passed down generationally, holding us from full realization and peace.
Bringing our present day issues into focus, we will create systemic rituals to engage our generational lineage who are ready and willing to provide resources, strength, and support.
This seminar is for those experienced in family constellations or shamanic work, as well as those with a genuine desire to access ancestral wisdom and resources.
The Power of blending Constellations and Shamanic Ritual
Systemic Ritual is an evolutionary method developed by Daan van Kampenhout, born from his considerable study of Family Constellations and Shamanic ritual practices. Daan realized that melding the powers of family constellations and Systemic Ritual can effectively address personal challenges by ultizing the power of the collective field.
Traditional Family Constellation methods focus on pinpointing the origin of individual or family problems, Systemic Ritual embraces the entire abstract essence of a family’s story. This approach allows for the transformation of long-held issues into collective archetypal themes, making each ritual meaningful and relevant to all participants.
Under Susanne’s guidance, we will access the ancestor field through Systemic Ritual in relation to family issues, including entanglements, conflicts, and destructive patterns. Drawing on the rich tradition of Shamanic practice, honoring the cardinal directions, and incorporating the rhythmic sound of the drum, prayers, and structured patterns, each ritual can be a meaningful, relevant, powerful tool for healing and unity in our everyday lives.
Susanne’s approach is spiritual, yet down to earth. With her passion for travelling and immersing herself in different cultures, combined with all the knowledge she has gained, she is a teacher with her own style and is open-hearted to all that is.
Host: Candyce L Rusk, Austin Constellations Circle
Candyce L Rusk, Family Systemic Constellation Facilitator, intuitive, energy practitioner and playwright, is very pleased to welcome Susanne Hazen and her powerful therapeutic and fascinating work to Austin.
Candyce discovered Susanne’s on-line, overseas Systemic Ritual coursework in 2022. Impressed with her skillful blending of family constellations and distinctive shamanic ritual, Candyce realized the inherent power, clarity and resources the combination brings to traditional Constellations.
Every choice we make must be made with the next seven generations in mind. Wisdom of American Indians.
In a narrow sense, our ancestors are our relatives with whom we have a blood relationship. In a broader sense, it also means joint relatives from earlier times, from which we descend collectively – as humanity, nation, community, and population group. This blog is about the first definition – the family.
OUR history begins before we are born. We represent the hereditary influences of our race, and our ancestors virtually live in us. James Nasmyth
Deep connection with our ancestors
The field of our ancestors has a lot of effect on us. The family’s energy field – the blood bond – is strong enough to influence descendants for generations. In this field are the relatives who have produced children and those who died young or remained childless.
The family is a system, and everyone within that system is connected, whether we are aware of it or not. Every person in a family is connected to all other relatives, even if they are long dead or concealed. One also remains connected with family members who have been excluded or rejected.
I was born by myself but carry the spirit and blood of my father, mother and my ancestors. So I am really never alone. My identity is through that line. Ziggy Marley
Empower or disprove
This connection with our ancestors can strengthen and weaken us – depending on who you are attuned to. When you are attuned to ancestors who are in good shape, it gives you inner strength. However, being attuned to ancestors who are still suffering can weaken you—especially when you unconsciously want to take away their pain, cry their tears, and take on their burden. That is not possible. You are only strong enough to carry your own burden. You can’t wear other people’s burdens. This entanglement can be resolved through a Family Constellation or Systemic Ritual. Both in a family constellation and in a Systemic Ritual, the suffering of one or more ancestors is made visible, and the aim is to alleviate and, if possible, heal this suffering.
We are a continuum. Just as we reach back to our ancestors for our fundamental values, so we, as guardians of that legacy, must reach ahead to our children and their children. And we do so with a sense of sacredness in that reaching. Paul Tsongas
Suffering of ancestors
Life has its joys but also its traumas. Traumas can continue for a long time – even in descendants generations later. These are major traumas – miscarriages, abortions, divorces, children who died, mothers or fathers who died early and left behind young children, alienations, loss of home, having to flee, forced migrations, victims and perpetrators of all forms from abuse of power (from rape to slavery), war traumas ………. Ancestors who have experienced these kinds of things have to deal with it even after death. Even after death, they still need healing. Therefore, in many cultures, there is still the idea that ancestors need prayers and rituals to bring healing, after which they can join those who have already found peace. In a healed state, they can have a supportive effect on the descendants.
Tuning in to strength-giving ancestors
Fortunately, it is not only traumatic experiences stored in the field of our ancestors that can affect us. Many good experiences are also stored in that field. We can connect with that to experience wholeness and strength. When the line to ancestral power is open, life takes on direction and meaning, and we can handle difficulties – which are therefore experienced as a challenge rather than a problem. Strength-giving ancestors are usually ancestors that are at least two or three generations away from us. They have already healed the wounds of their lives and can transfer the life force. You can tune in to these ancestors. This idea comes from shamanism. The concept of strength is central to shamanism. When someone does not feel well, a search for power sources is needed within the shamanistic viewpoint. People can connect with those power sources to strengthen themselves. With that power, they can then take the next step in solving their problem to feel better again.
As you have read in my previous blogs, I was in South Africa for the last few weeks. I spent time in Towerland (Langeberg mountains) and Wilderness, among other places.
This is one of the areas of the San – the oldest people in the world. They are descendants of the oldest people on earth. Recent genetic studies show that San genes date back to the oldest human genetic material in the world. And since Homo Sapiens – as far as we know now – migrated from southern and eastern Africa to other parts of the world – it could be that my and your distant, distant, distant ancestors walked here.
And I was allowed to walk on that ground. I experienced this as very special and healing. And it made me realize once again how humble we are.
Meet our distant ancestors.
Another online circle, Systemic Ritual, will be on Monday, March 11, 2024. This time, we are going to meet our distant ancestors. Are you joining us? See:
Let me take you back to the centuries that preceded us.
The last word on the evolution of Homo Sapiens has not yet been said. But we know almost certainly that many hominins from different species preceded us and lived side by side for millions of years. And the origin of these hominids was, as far as we now know, in the south and east of Africa. The oldest known hominid, Homo habilis, evolved about 2.8 million ago. H. habilis was the first known human species to use stone tools. The stone tools found in caves in South Africa may belong to Homo Habilis. And I got to touch it!!! About 1.8 million years ago, Homo erectus, the ‘upright walking man’, appeared. H. Erecus spread through Africa and Eurasia. He lived on this earth for more than one and a half million years. (What do you think – shall we – the homo sapiens – come so far, or do we destroy ourselves soon enough?) During those years, various ‘variants’ of Homo Erectus emerged. Homo ergaster is one of them. This one stayed in Africa. Homo Sapiens (us) evolved from this species about 200,000 years ago. And the home Sapiens has spread all over the world.
The San – descendants of the oldest people on earth
Back then, long, long ago, there was a woman named =Um-=um-Borose. She was our mother and she came from the sun. Umum Borose, after her death, gives birth to children of the sun, the San people. From: https://rozenbergquarterly.com/de-historie-van-de-san/
The San is a name for different population groups in South Africa, Namibia, Botswana, and Angola. They belong to the Khoisan. They simply call themselves ‘people’ or ‘real people’ in their own language. The Dutch colonists called them ‘Bushman’. This name refers to the bushes among which they lived. The Dutch were not that friendly to them, by the way. In the early nineteenth century, most San were exterminated or expelled. As a result, due to a lack of examples, their knowledge of the petroglyphs and understanding of the medicinal properties of the vegetation disappeared.
The ancestors of the San were once the only people to inhabit the plains and mountains of southern Africa. They made petroglyphs that we can still find today. These petroglyphs are the first human art expressions.
They were nomadic tribes. They lived from hunting and from ‘veldkos’, an African word for everything that can be found and edible in and on the ‘field’. These are fruits, tubers, roots, nuts, seeds, honey, and ostrich eggs. The San did not live anywhere permanently. There were areas and places where they kept coming back, including safe places in caves or fields with a few simple grass huts and a fire. As hunters, they had to follow the migration of wild animals in the dry season.
San culture was based on a high degree of equality. They were not fighters but lived according to the principle of giving and sharing. This principle allowed them to survive despite often harsh conditions.
When I draw my bow, I feel happy. It reminds me of the old days. We hunted and had a good life. Then, the white man came and took away our hunting grounds. He called us things from nothing. What kind of life is that? – Old Jacob Grandma. From: https://rozenbergquarterly.com/de-historie-van-de-san/
Fynbos
Fynbos is the vegetation that you only find in the Cape region of South Africa. The Dutch colonists gave the name fynbos. The name refers to the thin trunks of the shrubs, which are unsuitable for construction wood. The Cape Floral Kingdom is one of six flora kingdoms on earth. Although it is the smallest, it is the flora kingdom with the most diverse vegetation types. The fynbos is – unfortunately – very ruined. Agriculture, wine growing and exotic plant species have largely displaced this original vegetation. Numerous fynbos plants are already extinct, and more than a thousand species are threatened with extinction. Reserves are now designated to preserve and restore parts of the vegetation. Many types of fynbos were used in traditional medicine by the Khoi San. Nowadays, this traditional knowledge is being researched. Unfortunately, a lot of expertise has been lost. I did a tour with Branden in Wilderness. He is still starting up his company, but you can find him here: Branden Wilderness I was impressed by his knowledge of ecology and the passion with which he is restoring the native vegetation on his property, in particular by removing non-native vegetation. I also learned a lot about natural medicines. It is a must-see and must-experience for anyone with a heart to take care of our planet and its ecosystem. And last but not least, visiting the cave where our ancestors lived for thousands of years was awe-inspiring.
As you can read in my previous blog, last week I was in Towerland for the training week: I Am of This Place: Deepening Our Sacred Relationship with Life and with Land with Tanja Meyburgh and Sue Davidoff. This week, we focused on exploring our sense of ‘belonging’. We did this by connecting to the Land through our senses, rituals, movement and Land constellations. In the previous blog, you could also read that I often experience difficulty fitting in. So, this week was very educational for me personally. And, of course, I have gained a lot of inspiration for my work as a facilitator in Systemic Ritual and Systemic Constellations.
However, the personal steps I took and the insights I gained were really important to me. In response to my previous post, someone wrote: “… Not fitting in is also a theme of mine, as well as being excluded and different. I always felt like a world citizen and didn’t want a connection with any nationality. ….. “.
This is also very recognizable to me, being a world citizen and not wanting to tie myself to one nationality or another. Perhaps that is why I have developed such a unique accent – not traceable to any country. The disadvantage of this is that everyone asks you, no matter where you are, “Where are you from?” Actually, with this question alone – no matter how “normal” that question is – people tell you “You are NOT from here.” Add to that the fact that I am indeed somewhat ‘alien’ in some respects, and the feeling of ‘not belonging’ is complete.
What would be a better question?
However, whatever the case is, I can feel at home – with my entire being – wherever I am. The true sense of ‘being in my place’ is within myself, and in that respect, I am indeed a citizen of the world. In the future, I will make more conscious contact with Land. As soon as I arrive, I will greet the Land and thank it for allowing me to be there. I take in everything that grows on the Land and inhabits the Land and greet, ‘Hello, here I am, Susanne Hazen. Thank you for allowing me here.’ This also means that I will approach the Land and everything there at that moment with respect and love and adapt; as flexible as Water. I will consciously inhale the Air and share something of myself with my exhalation. And with my passion – the Fire within me – I will give the country my love. I need to learn to trust that I can do that and that it will be enough. Unfortunately, I grew up in an atmosphere where I was made to feel like I never gave enough. With my sensitivity to sense the atmosphere and inability to keep up appearances, I have often been accused of being ‘someone who breaks the game’.
The land constellations that we did showed how humans still do not know how to relate to the Land. There is still a long way to go in that regard. I think we need to go back to how the original man, the man from the hunter and gatherer era, looked at Land. Namely that Land is for everyone and that it is essentially incorrect to appropriate Land (or Water or Air). Something that man has started doing since he started cultivating the Land. This has usually been at the expense of others (people, vegetation and animals) and is, in my opinion, incorrectly called civilizing.
In addition, we often ignore areas of Land where ancestors are buried or areas of Land that are considered ‘sacred’ for whatever reason. This is overlooked too often. Men, literally, rolled over it. This asks for conflicts. There are too many examples of this in this world right now.
How do we find our way back to a healthy relationship with Land?
I am of this place. To be continued.
P.s. I always enjoy it when you write a comment. Feel free to do that. You won’t see your comment immediately because I have to approve it first. But then it’s there.
As you have already read in my previous blog, I travelled to South Africa for new inspiration. I will participate in the training week: I Am of This Place: Deepening Our Sacred Relationship with Life and with Land with Tanja Meyburgh and Sue Davidoff. On Monday, this week will start. It is a week in which we will explore our sense of ‘belonging’ and nourish ourselves by connecting with the land through our senses, rituals, movement and land constellations.
Prior to this week, I first made a short tour through this beautiful country. The influence of the Dutch, who colonized the country here from the mid-17th century to the 19th century, is indelible and the impact of this period is still present. While driving through the southern part, you will mainly encounter Dutch place names and street names. Afrikaans (almost Dutch) is officially the third language of the country – next to English and the traditional languages of the original inhabitants. The wine farms, coveted by tourists and offering wine-tasting opportunities, hide a traumatic past for the original inhabitants. The indigenous Khoisan population was expelled by the Dutch and has been without a homeland since. Apologies have now been made – at the end of 2022 – for the slavery past by the Dutch government and in July 2023 by the king himself. However, I still notice little awareness of this past in Dutch society. And South Africa was hardly mentioned in the speeches surrounding the apology. An apology is a first step, but then the real work should start, but I don’t see much of that yet. In my opinion, the protests by the Khoisan in October 2023, during the visit of the Dutch king and queen, were therefore entirely justified.
This history of the Netherlands always gives me a bad feeling. Whenever I am confronted with this history, I prefer to escape into ‘NOT belonging’. I have a fantastic excuse – born and raised in Limburg – a province that was not yet part of the Netherlands in the centuries in question. However, I have lived and worked in the ‘real’ Netherlands for over 40 years, but I still have the feeling of ‘just not belonging’. I don’t even know if it’s ‘not wanting to fit in’ or just ‘feeling left out’.
Who knows what the next week will bring me. On to: I Am of This Place.
Systemic Ritual and Systemic Constellations 