When you get into a relationship, you leave family norms and values behind, and one of the partners tries to get something from the other that he/she could not get from his/her parents. And yes, the other person has a lot of influence on your relationship. But: the attachment style you have with your parents also has a lot of influence. In this blog I’ll give you a short introduction about the different attachment styles and how a Systemic Ritual can help with that.
Category Archives: Systemic Ritual
Systemic Ritual for cross-cultural and non-traditional relationships
When two people come together and start being a couple, both of them will have that loyalty to their family of origin. Two different perspectives come together, that will want to move forward on a shared path.
The parent-child relationship and the impact on partner relationships
Not a single parent is perfect. Even if your father and mother would have been some kind of Buddhas, they wouldn’t have been ideal for you. Even Buddhas aren’t capable of giving a child what it needs, since the needs of a child are endless. Besides that, parents have their obligations and responsibilities towards their children. This means that they can’t just fulfil all their child’s needs. The result is that everyone of us has a jar of unfulfilled needs that has to be filled by something or someone else.
Relationships – The perspective from systemic constellations
A couple relationship isn’t a relationship between two people, but a relationship between many people. Think of it as the congregation of two planets: each planet is connected to a bigger picture. As human beings, we’re also part of a bigger picture: a family, a living environment, a country, a culture. When you’re in a couple relationship, you will also deal with his or her family, living environment, culture, etc.
The four directions
The wheel of the four directions – also known as the Medicine Wheel – is a model from shamanic cultures. The wheel teaches you that there are always four perspectives from which you can look at things. The four views are derived from the four directions: North, East, South, West.
Collective Ancestors
In a narrow sense, our ancestors are our relatives with whom we have a blood relationship. In a broader sense, it also means joint relatives from earlier times, from which we descend collectively – as humanity, nation, community, population group.
In the article ‘Our ancestors, who are they?’ you can read about the Ancestors we have a blood relationship with. This article is about our collective ancestors.
Soul loss and soul retrieval
In shamanistic traditions, it is stated that parts of the soul can separate from us and that this separation, this loss of soul parts, can be a cause of physical and mental illness.
The Wheel of the Souls
In the article “The Multiple Soul”, you have read that shamanistic traditions assume multiple souls. In my work, I distinguish the family soul, the tribal soul, the individual soul, and the universal soul. You can give the souls a place on the Wheel of the four directions, and the Wheel tells something about the development.Continue reading “The Wheel of the Souls”
The White Spider and the mental body
(Photo: The Spider = from the PsychoMotion Methode Reflectiekaarten– http://www.psychomotion.nl/producten/) In the article ‘Five bodies or our being‘ you could read about the different bodies. In this article I describe a Systemic Ritual to support the mental body. You can perform this ritual alone or with others. In this ritual, the White Spider is used.Continue reading “The White Spider and the mental body”
Systemic Ritual, Shamanism and Theatre – who am I?
As Systemic Ritual is related to Shamanic work, I want to explain how theatre is associated with Shamanism.
The origins of theatre.
Systemic Ritual and Systemic Constellations 